My brother Andrew Back has gone Jay Chou on us, and wants to kill himself with martial arts weapons he can’t possibly use:

Andrew: lemme do some research
Elliott: What sort of thing?
Andrew: weapon
Elliott: You want like a sai?
Andrew: actually, probably just num chucks
Elliott: Nunchuks are hard to use.
Andrew: i know
Andrew: but with practice…
Elliott: Oh!
Andrew: but how ’bout them ‘chucks?
Elliott: http://www.lyon-martial-arts.com/buy/wp-si-07
Andrew: ahhh
Andrew: hey, the nunchukus are a lot cheaper than the Sai
Elliott: They’re more dangerous.
Andrew: and as a result more fun
Elliott: I can’t use a pair of nunchucks without hurting myself.
Andrew: the pain makes you try harder
Elliott: Uhhhh
Andrew: it would be a fun experience
Elliott: Er….
Andrew: i could just spend christmas break smashing myself up

Says Zhou Jie Lun,

What weapon do I like the most?
The Nun-chuks, gentle yet firm
I want to go to Henan Sung Mountain
To learn Shao-lin and Wu Tang